daily practice
When I first started practicing yoga, I was a stressed out graduate student, with no time or money. A friend dragged me to $5 Friday yoga, and I remember thinking first, “When is this going to be over?” and then, “When can I do that again?” Savasana was the hardest part of practice for me. I felt worried about being unproductive, and my mind was racing the entire time. But something sparked my attention, and I kept returning every Friday for a whole semester. The next semester, Evolution ran a one month special at a discounted price. Anyone who took 28 classes won a free massage. Well, like a kid at a buffet, I wanted to get my money’s worth and I wanted that massage! I must have taken every class on the schedule. And from then on, I was hooked. I realized how important a daily practice was for my overall wellbeing, and my relationships. I was learning how to take better care of myself; how to pause and breathe, and how to be less reactive.
I’ve had a consistent, daily practice for over 10 years now. There have been times when my practice has consisted entirely of savasana or child’s pose, and times when my practice has included many handstands. The lesson I have learned is that it doesn’t matter what my practice looks like; it matters that I show up. There is something powerful about showing up for yourself, no matter what state you are in.
Over time, my practice has evolved, and now meditation, mantra, and pranayama are my primary staples. I still have an asana practice, but I approach the movement as a meditation, versus a workout. I have learned how to hold space for myself, and how to listen. I have learned that I can stay present, even when things are difficult. I have learned to listen to my body, and know what emotions feel like physically. I have learned that I am often drawn into stories that are unhelpful, and if I pause and breathe, I can step out of my interpretation and explore the underlying emotion, which is almost always fear.
It can be challenging to sit and listen, because I don’t always like what I hear. It takes practice to meet myself with kindness, especially when my mind won’t stay still. It takes courage to leave the comfortable land of intellect (especially with my analytical mind), and to open my heart to myself exactly as I am. I’m not always good at it, but I’m committed to trying, and to examining the underlying assumption that I should be good at it.
I don’t believe that my practice makes me a better person. I believe that it helps me be better at being myself. At my core, I know that my true nature is love. I also know that I have a lot of habits that stem from fear; that I can be reactive and judgmental. Meditation reveals my patterns, and challenges me to unlearn my habits.
Because I have learned to show up for myself, I now have strategies to nurture myself when I feel wounded, and to stay present with difficult moments, even when every fiber of my ego-being wants to run away. I am able to be more honest and authentic. This helps me to meet each moment as it is, and to meet my friends and family where they are.
Yoga is so much more than exercise, and so much more than our time on the mat. It is about how we show up skillfully in the world, and how we relate to ourselves and each other. A consistent, daily practice, particularly one that includes meditation, can reveal our habits and patterns of reactivity, and teach us how to stay present through life’s challenges.
If you are looking for support in developing or maintaining a daily practice, learning to meditate, or translating your practice into daily life, consider joining the Rhythms of Life sangha for support in developing and maintaining a personalized wellness practice.
